


Things Left Unsaid

by OcarinaSonata



Category: Shield of Tomorrow (Web Series), Shield of Tomorrow (Webseries), shield of tomorrow
Genre: Anxiety, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Nightmares, Other, Post Wicked Play, Sleeping Bags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-04
Updated: 2018-07-04
Packaged: 2019-06-05 04:21:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15162548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OcarinaSonata/pseuds/OcarinaSonata
Summary: Throlo knows that the nightmares aren't real, but that doesn't mean that the feelings instigated by them are any less there.





	Things Left Unsaid

A thousand whispers were running rampant within Throlo’s mind as she lay there atop the metal floor. And yet, they could do nothing to drown out Junil’s voice calling out to her, desperate and breathy.

“Doctor, please, you need to fight this.” Junil was pleading at this point, tears shining in their eyes. 

But the nanites throughout Throlo’s body couldn’t seem to hear, or at the very least doesn’t seem to care, as it continued its icy warpath. The feeling of cold used to be a comfort to her, but now it was draining.

“Throlo, please.” Junil’s tears fell faster as she could see the color drain from the Doctor’s face.

While all of her mind wanted to respond, the voices were beginning to drown out Throlo’s own thoughts, feelings, and wants. Words left unspoken lingered in the air. If only she had spoken them, if only she had made her feelings clear, then maybe Throlo wouldn’t be left with so much regret lingering in her mind.

A sting in her neck alerted the Doctor to a hypospray being applied, but the nanites didn’t slow or stumble as they assimilated her system. Desperation, fear, and agony wracked her body as she pried her eyes open, just to see the Commander’s face, one last time.

“Throlo, I need you to fight this for me. Just stay here with me a little longer till M’Tazi can get here. He can help you, you just have to stay with me. Can you start listing your symptoms for me Doctor?” Junil’s voice cracked as they placed one of Throlo’s hand within theirs.

Throlo looked up at Junil, seeing their grey eyes overflowing with tears. If only she could have told them how she felt, she thought as the pain stole the consciousness from her. If only she had one more moment, to say the words that were left unsaid.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Throlo shot upright in the bed, breathing heavily as she wildly scanned the room around her. It was her room on the ship, not the public space of Narendra Station.

Over to her right on the floor was the sleeping form of Junil, curled up in their deep crimson sleeping bag. Even after Throlo had offered to let them up on the bed. Obviously she was still implying that the Commander would be in the sleeping bag-- obviously. But, Junil still insisted on taking the floor, as it would be unseemly to have two commanding officers sharing a bed. 

Now in the moment, however, she was relieved as the Commander hadn’t felt the thrashing of the Doctor as she tried to physically fight off the nanites, nor heard her attempts to call out to Junil inside of her dreams.

“What a coward I am,” Throlo mumbled to herself, pulling the sheets closer to her body, in an attempt to calm her raging heartbeat.

“Who are you calling a coward?” Junil asks, groggily rubbing their eyes as they pushed themselves up onto their elbows in order to face the Doctor.

“I’m sorry that I woke you Commander, it’s nothing.” Throlo brushed some of her hair behind her ear, obviously flustered from getting caught.

“Because you are one of the bravest people I have met. I have never once seen you act like a coward. So, you might want to rescind that statement.” They just stared at Throlo, ignoring her attempts to brush everything off.

“Commander-”

“Do you want to tell me what’s really going on, or would you rather I leave you alone with your thoughts?” Junil looked straight at Throlo, not wavering in the slightest.

“No- I-” Throlo stumbled over her words, “ I just had another nightmare, that’s all.”

They looked down, before meeting Throlo’s eyes again. “Nightmares lie. They always show you the things that aren’t real.”

“But it felt real.” Throlo met Junil’s gaze at this point, tears collecting in the corners of her eyes. 

Noticing the tears, Junil grabbed their crutches that were stashed under the bed and pulled themselves up.

“Are you leaving then?” she asked, almost afraid of the answer.

“No.” The Commander replied curtly, before gesturing to the other side of the bed. “May I?” Throlo just nodded, as Junil climbed in, resting their crutches against the night stand.

Once inside, Junil just sat across from the doctor, eyes staring directly into hers. “I promise you that this is real, not whatever image was in your nightmare.”

Throlo just smiled, wiping the eyes from her eyes, “Thank you.”

“Now,” they looked at the Andorian with a stern look, “is there anything else you would like to talk about before you get some more sleep?”

The Doctor paused, the unspoken feelings suddenly reasserting themselves again. “Junil I have one more thing.” She put her hand on their cheek tentatively, afraid that if she did anything more that they might leave her alone. “I care for you, as more than just my Commander or my friend. I think I’ve fallen for you, and I know that you and Tolosh are involved, and I know that I haven’t really expressed anything--”

“Throlo,” Junil interrupted, looking at her with a sparkle in her eyes.

“I know that this is sudden, but we keep getting into these life-threatening situations all of the time now and--”

“Throlo,” Junil repeated, one eyebrow raised at the rambling woman in front of them.

“Plus, as I said before, I understand that you and Tolosh are together, but as you know Andorians do marry multiple partners and I would never ask you to end things--”

“Throlo,” Junil put a hand on her shoulder.

“Yes?” Throlo stopped, suddenly aware that she hadn’t let Junil respond to her sudden deceleration.

“I also care for you more than as my Doctor or as my friend. In fact, I’m pretty sure that I’m in love with you.” Junil just smiled at her.

“Oh.” Throlo just paused, obviously not anticipating this kind of response

“ I would very much like to kiss you now, if you would like me to.” They continued.

“Wait-- what now?” Throlo paused, not seeming to interpret the words just spoken to her.

“I would like to kiss you, is that alright?” Junil repeated, a smile tugging at the corner of their lips.

“Yes-- that’s-- it’s more than alright,” she replied, a blush heating up her cheeks as her heart seemed to want to beat out of her chest. 

They leaned forward, before pausing as if they were asking her again.

Throlo looked at their lips, which seemed soft and alluring. Taking in a deep breath as if to gather her courage, she closed the distance between them.

The first thing that Throlo noticed was how warm their lips were, and how well they fit with her own. All of the fears and the anxiety were pushed to the back of her mind as the overwhelming presence of Junil washed over her. She reached out and rested her hand on the back of her partners neck, stroking it tenderly. She almost felt sad when the two pulled apart for air.

“That was-” Throlo paused, grasping for the words to describe the moment. “ I love you. I know I’ve pretty much already said that, but I feel like it needs to be repeated.”

Junil nodded, a smile curling at their lips. “ I don’t think I will ever mind hearing those words from you.”

“We are going to need to tell the Captain,” Throlo realized, which brought all of the nervousness and anxiety right back up to the surface.

“That can wait till morning.” They just put their arms around Throlo, “ I believe a certain brilliant Doctor needs to listen to her own wise words, and get some sleep.”

She just shook her head, before lying back down. “You know, I never thought that you would ever be the one lecturing me to go to sleep.”

“I learned from the best.” Junil kissed her forehead, curling up against the Andorian. “Now sleep, there will be plenty to discuss in the morning.

Rolling her eyes, Throlo snuggled deeper into their arms, relishing once again the comfort that Junil brings. Her eyes began droop as the moment dragged on, her hand clasping at theirs as it rests atop Throlo’s midsection. Tomorrow may bring new challenges, but for now, all that seemed to matter was that the cold was gone, and all that Throlo could feel around her was the presence of one Junil Rue.


End file.
